It's the last blog post of the semester, and I'm not even going to be talking about my own work!
For this review, I'll be looking at Ryan Wolfe's "A Reflection" for one of his essay's body sections. My comments for him can be found here.
An explanation of the peer review activity you selected for the project you reviewed
I'll be talking about Ryan's rough draft for his final project in the form of a video essay, and I provided some suggestions on the form he employed.
An explanation of how you think you helped the author with your feedback
Ryan has an excellent rough draft of his reflection, but I feel like the voiceover was a major lackluster part of the piece, and re-recording it would do the video a great service. Also, by integrating the video cuts better the video will have a more cohesive flow.
An explanation of how you incorporated something from the suggested Student’s Guide readings (or any other course materials, if you’d prefer) into your feedback
When looking at the video essays posted for us to view and my own from project 3, I found that integrating video clips well and having a good voiceover were both super important to a video essay.
One thing about their work that you admired or think you could learn from
It was interesting to see how he broke down the reflection into projects rather than into different personal sections like I did.
Friday, May 6, 2016
Editorial Report
Did anything else change before I decided I was done? Yes, yes it did.
Rough Cut
After sitting down in class and learning that the rhetorical situation of a piece is of paramount importance, I realized that a new approach to my research was going to be needed. This revelation was further stressed by the research reports we completed as process work leading up to the creation of our rough and final drafts for each project. In the blog post entitled “My Sources” I was researching not only to find sources, but to find information about the sources themselves as evidenced by me delving into the author’s own background such as when I discussed an article “written by Peter Fairley, a freelance writer who writes almost exclusively on energy around the world, he writes for IEEE Spectrum, Nature, and MIT Technology Review” (Allred, “My Sources” 1). I even came to discuss the author’s potential bias while writing, noting that “he may be slightly biased on the subject as he argues for renewable energy in various nations across the globe such as France, Canada, and the United States” which is something that previously I would have never considered (Allred, “My Sources” 1). At the time I was certainly unhappy with all of that seemingly useless work that I was being asked to do, but now I have come to see that by looking at all aspects of a piece before using it in my own work I have a deeper understanding of what the author was really trying to convey with their writing. SOME TRANSITION
Edited Cut
After sitting through the first days of lecture and learning that that something as basic as the rhetorical situation of a piece is of paramount importance, I realized that a new approach to my research was going to be needed. This revelation was further stressed by the research reports we completed as process work leading up to the creation of our rough and final drafts for each project. In one of my first blog posts entitled “My Sources” I was researching not only to find sources, but to find information on the sources themselves. It’s easy to see me delving into these details like the author’s own background when I discussed an article “written by Peter Fairley, a freelance writer who writes almost exclusively on energy around the world, he writes for IEEE Spectrum, Nature, and MIT Technology Review” (Allred, “My Sources” 1). I even came to discuss the author’s potential bias while writing, noting that “he may be slightly biased on the subject as he argues for renewable energy in various nations across the globe such as France, Canada, and the United States” which is something that previously I would have never considered to be of any major importance unless a distortion of the facts was clearly evident (Allred, “My Sources” 1). At the time I was certainly unhappy with all of that seemingly useless work that I was being asked to do, but now I have come to see that by looking at all aspects of a piece before using it in my own work I have a deeper understanding of what the author was really trying to convey with their writing. When I’ve finished conducting my initial bouts of researching, it’s finally going to be time to begin putting words down on the page, the toughest part of writing.
How did the content change (even slightly - details matter!) when you re-edited it? Why do you think the content is being communicated more effectively in the re-edited version?
Well, there's now no more "SOME TRANSITION" which I don't think was a great way for me to leave the reader going into the next paragraph since it doesn't tell them anything.
How did the form change (even slightly - details matter!) when you re-edited it? Why do you think the form is presenting the content more effectively in the re-edited version?
Once again the form didn't really change since for the most part I was just copy editing my piece, but it's still important to note that by adding a transition sentence I more closely follow the guidelines of an essay.
Rough Cut
After sitting down in class and learning that the rhetorical situation of a piece is of paramount importance, I realized that a new approach to my research was going to be needed. This revelation was further stressed by the research reports we completed as process work leading up to the creation of our rough and final drafts for each project. In the blog post entitled “My Sources” I was researching not only to find sources, but to find information about the sources themselves as evidenced by me delving into the author’s own background such as when I discussed an article “written by Peter Fairley, a freelance writer who writes almost exclusively on energy around the world, he writes for IEEE Spectrum, Nature, and MIT Technology Review” (Allred, “My Sources” 1). I even came to discuss the author’s potential bias while writing, noting that “he may be slightly biased on the subject as he argues for renewable energy in various nations across the globe such as France, Canada, and the United States” which is something that previously I would have never considered (Allred, “My Sources” 1). At the time I was certainly unhappy with all of that seemingly useless work that I was being asked to do, but now I have come to see that by looking at all aspects of a piece before using it in my own work I have a deeper understanding of what the author was really trying to convey with their writing. SOME TRANSITION
Edited Cut
After sitting through the first days of lecture and learning that that something as basic as the rhetorical situation of a piece is of paramount importance, I realized that a new approach to my research was going to be needed. This revelation was further stressed by the research reports we completed as process work leading up to the creation of our rough and final drafts for each project. In one of my first blog posts entitled “My Sources” I was researching not only to find sources, but to find information on the sources themselves. It’s easy to see me delving into these details like the author’s own background when I discussed an article “written by Peter Fairley, a freelance writer who writes almost exclusively on energy around the world, he writes for IEEE Spectrum, Nature, and MIT Technology Review” (Allred, “My Sources” 1). I even came to discuss the author’s potential bias while writing, noting that “he may be slightly biased on the subject as he argues for renewable energy in various nations across the globe such as France, Canada, and the United States” which is something that previously I would have never considered to be of any major importance unless a distortion of the facts was clearly evident (Allred, “My Sources” 1). At the time I was certainly unhappy with all of that seemingly useless work that I was being asked to do, but now I have come to see that by looking at all aspects of a piece before using it in my own work I have a deeper understanding of what the author was really trying to convey with their writing. When I’ve finished conducting my initial bouts of researching, it’s finally going to be time to begin putting words down on the page, the toughest part of writing.
How did the content change (even slightly - details matter!) when you re-edited it? Why do you think the content is being communicated more effectively in the re-edited version?
Well, there's now no more "SOME TRANSITION" which I don't think was a great way for me to leave the reader going into the next paragraph since it doesn't tell them anything.
How did the form change (even slightly - details matter!) when you re-edited it? Why do you think the form is presenting the content more effectively in the re-edited version?
Once again the form didn't really change since for the most part I was just copy editing my piece, but it's still important to note that by adding a transition sentence I more closely follow the guidelines of an essay.
Editorial Report
Now that I'm about to submit, what have I changed from my rough draft?
Rough Cut
Terry Hayes once wrote that "the world doesn't change in front of your eyes, it changes behind your back," a sentiment that I find rather comforting as I look back on the experiences that I have had and shared this semester. I walked into an English class in January knowing little of what to expect besides what I had experienced in classes prior. As time passed I found that the class I was expecting was vastly different from the one that I received, but I was able to adapt to the challenges and see that my understanding of English was growing each day. Now I see a future where I will not only be expected to write, but to provide insight into the situation at hand. Despite this knowledge that I have now, I did not always see this class as a way to strengthen my understanding but time makes that detail clear. Yet as I made my way through the course I was forced to struggle with conducting research like I never had before, understanding how I needed to manage my limited time, and even taking care of myself in order to become a proficient writer.
Edited Cut
Terry Hayes once wrote that "the world doesn't change in front of your eyes, it changes behind your back," a sentiment that I find rather comforting as I look back on the experiences that I have had over the course of this semester. Just four short months ago in January I walked into an English class knowing little of what to expect besides what I had experienced before in high school. As time passed I found that the class I was expecting was vastly different from the one that I received, but I was able to adapt to the challenges and see that my understanding of English was growing each day. Despite the knowledge that I now retain, I did not always see this class as a way to strengthen my skills, but time has made that detail clear. Now I see a future where I will not only be expected to write, but to provide insight into the situation at hand using a variety of different strategies, whether it be delving into the rhetorical situation or simply working in a new genre. Yet as I made my way through the course I was forced to struggle with conducting research like I never had before, understanding how I needed to manage my limited time, and even taking care of myself in order to become a proficient writer.
How did the content change (even slightly - details matter!) when you re-edited it? Why do you think the content is being communicated more effectively in the re-edited version?
I was mostly making copy edits in this section, but one examples of a change was moving the sentence "despite this knowledge" forward in the paragraph. I believe the paragraph now flows a bit better and has a more logical progression.
How did the form change (even slightly - details matter!) when you re-edited it? Why do you think the form is presenting the content more effectively in the re-edited version?
Rough Cut
Terry Hayes once wrote that "the world doesn't change in front of your eyes, it changes behind your back," a sentiment that I find rather comforting as I look back on the experiences that I have had and shared this semester. I walked into an English class in January knowing little of what to expect besides what I had experienced in classes prior. As time passed I found that the class I was expecting was vastly different from the one that I received, but I was able to adapt to the challenges and see that my understanding of English was growing each day. Now I see a future where I will not only be expected to write, but to provide insight into the situation at hand. Despite this knowledge that I have now, I did not always see this class as a way to strengthen my understanding but time makes that detail clear. Yet as I made my way through the course I was forced to struggle with conducting research like I never had before, understanding how I needed to manage my limited time, and even taking care of myself in order to become a proficient writer.
Edited Cut
Terry Hayes once wrote that "the world doesn't change in front of your eyes, it changes behind your back," a sentiment that I find rather comforting as I look back on the experiences that I have had over the course of this semester. Just four short months ago in January I walked into an English class knowing little of what to expect besides what I had experienced before in high school. As time passed I found that the class I was expecting was vastly different from the one that I received, but I was able to adapt to the challenges and see that my understanding of English was growing each day. Despite the knowledge that I now retain, I did not always see this class as a way to strengthen my skills, but time has made that detail clear. Now I see a future where I will not only be expected to write, but to provide insight into the situation at hand using a variety of different strategies, whether it be delving into the rhetorical situation or simply working in a new genre. Yet as I made my way through the course I was forced to struggle with conducting research like I never had before, understanding how I needed to manage my limited time, and even taking care of myself in order to become a proficient writer.
How did the content change (even slightly - details matter!) when you re-edited it? Why do you think the content is being communicated more effectively in the re-edited version?
I was mostly making copy edits in this section, but one examples of a change was moving the sentence "despite this knowledge" forward in the paragraph. I believe the paragraph now flows a bit better and has a more logical progression.
How did the form change (even slightly - details matter!) when you re-edited it? Why do you think the form is presenting the content more effectively in the re-edited version?
I didn't really change the form in this section since I was only making small edits rather than drastic changes.
Thursday, May 5, 2016
Open Post To Peer Reviewers
It's really the end, isn't it? So how do I feel about my work this semester?
Key information about your particular project that you would like anyone who peer reviews your draft to know
I think that my rough draft is actually going to be very close to what my final draft is since I've spent a lot of time writing it so far, and hope that most of the edits that I make will be smaller changes rather than complete rewrites.
Major issues or weaknesses in the “Rough Cut” that you’re already aware of (as well as anything you’d like to know from your editors about those weaknesses)
I'd definitely like to revise some of the language that I used in the piece and make some copy edits along with looking over the verb tenses I used, since I feel like it varied a lot more than it should have.
Major virtues or strengths in the “Rough Cut” that you’re already aware of (as well as anything you’d like to know from your editors about those strengths)
I feel like this gives a good insight into how I felt while working on these projects this semester, and also does a good job of explaining how I've become a better writer through this class.
Key information about your particular project that you would like anyone who peer reviews your draft to know
I think that my rough draft is actually going to be very close to what my final draft is since I've spent a lot of time writing it so far, and hope that most of the edits that I make will be smaller changes rather than complete rewrites.
Major issues or weaknesses in the “Rough Cut” that you’re already aware of (as well as anything you’d like to know from your editors about those weaknesses)
I'd definitely like to revise some of the language that I used in the piece and make some copy edits along with looking over the verb tenses I used, since I feel like it varied a lot more than it should have.
Major virtues or strengths in the “Rough Cut” that you’re already aware of (as well as anything you’d like to know from your editors about those strengths)
I feel like this gives a good insight into how I felt while working on these projects this semester, and also does a good job of explaining how I've become a better writer through this class.
Sunday, May 1, 2016
Peer Review For Diego Alcantara
We're so close to end, so let's all finish strong!
For this review, I'll be looking at Diego Alcantara's production report 14b for one of his essay's body sections. My comments for him can be found here.
An explanation of the peer review activity you selected for the project you reviewed
So I'm going to be reviewing Diego's essay fragment and making some suggestions about the content which he can add to this section to improve it.
An explanation of how you think you helped the author with your feedback
I think that Diego has a really good start with this section of his piece, but it could be improved by adding in more concrete examples of how his research has improved since he started, including research reports and the interviews we conducted.
An explanation of how you incorporated something from the suggested Student’s Guide readings (or any other course materials, if you’d prefer) into your feedback
When looking at the other essays it is clear that there is often a lot of evidence presented to the reader, which Diego is lacking right now, so I suggested he add some so that he can improve his piece.
One thing about their work that you admired or think you could learn from
I like how he compares his writing experience before this class to what he's doing now and shows how he's "evolved" to where he is now.
For this review, I'll be looking at Diego Alcantara's production report 14b for one of his essay's body sections. My comments for him can be found here.
An explanation of the peer review activity you selected for the project you reviewed
So I'm going to be reviewing Diego's essay fragment and making some suggestions about the content which he can add to this section to improve it.
An explanation of how you think you helped the author with your feedback
I think that Diego has a really good start with this section of his piece, but it could be improved by adding in more concrete examples of how his research has improved since he started, including research reports and the interviews we conducted.
An explanation of how you incorporated something from the suggested Student’s Guide readings (or any other course materials, if you’d prefer) into your feedback
When looking at the other essays it is clear that there is often a lot of evidence presented to the reader, which Diego is lacking right now, so I suggested he add some so that he can improve his piece.
One thing about their work that you admired or think you could learn from
I like how he compares his writing experience before this class to what he's doing now and shows how he's "evolved" to where he is now.
Production Report
Oh man, how are we this close to being done?
Outline Closing:
"After a semester of rigorous writing exercises and new experiences, it's time to say goodbye and thanks for the ride. Show reader where I think I'll be headed with my own writing."
Rough Closing:
A few days ago, I left Ina Gittings Room 203 for the last time this semester and with that I have almost ended my time in English this semester. While it hasn't always been fun and I certainly haven't had an easy time with it, I feel like I'm leaving a more insightful writer, ready to tackle the challenges which will certainly face me in the future. Whether it be technical reports, presentations, or any other genre which I have not yet written in, I know that the skills I have learned this semester will make me proficient in whatever I need to tackle. Despite all of the hardships we endured to get here, I'm thankful that I've gained a new set of skills.
How did you decide to use form to present your content in the raw material you’ve shared here? How did the conventions of your chosen genre influence your choices?
I tried to make sure that I wrapped up my thoughts and did it in a way that was consistent with an essay format by starting with a narrow focus and ending on a broad point.
How did the production of this raw material go? What kinds of any hiccups, challenges, successes, creative epiphanies, etc. occurred during the process?
It took me a while to write this since I was fairly distracted by other things, but after focusing again it went fairly well.
Outline Closing:
"After a semester of rigorous writing exercises and new experiences, it's time to say goodbye and thanks for the ride. Show reader where I think I'll be headed with my own writing."
Rough Closing:
A few days ago, I left Ina Gittings Room 203 for the last time this semester and with that I have almost ended my time in English this semester. While it hasn't always been fun and I certainly haven't had an easy time with it, I feel like I'm leaving a more insightful writer, ready to tackle the challenges which will certainly face me in the future. Whether it be technical reports, presentations, or any other genre which I have not yet written in, I know that the skills I have learned this semester will make me proficient in whatever I need to tackle. Despite all of the hardships we endured to get here, I'm thankful that I've gained a new set of skills.
How did you decide to use form to present your content in the raw material you’ve shared here? How did the conventions of your chosen genre influence your choices?
I tried to make sure that I wrapped up my thoughts and did it in a way that was consistent with an essay format by starting with a narrow focus and ending on a broad point.
How did the production of this raw material go? What kinds of any hiccups, challenges, successes, creative epiphanies, etc. occurred during the process?
It took me a while to write this since I was fairly distracted by other things, but after focusing again it went fairly well.
Production Report
It's time to get cracking! Let's take a look at the first draft for my final project's introduction.
How did you decide to use form to present your content in the raw material you’ve shared here? How did the conventions of your chosen genre influence your choices?
Writing an essay is vastly different from a podcast and even a QRG since it often has a much more formal tone along with having less of a focus on easy to read snippets but rather on the information being presented and how it is presented.
How did the production of this raw material go? What kinds of any hiccups, challenges, successes, creative epiphanies, etc. occurred during the process?
It was kind of difficult to figure out how I wanted to start the piece since I'm not entirely sure of all of the points that I'll be making yet, but after a while I figured out where I wanted to go.
Outline Opening:
"Talk about how it's been a rough semester for many reasons, but now that it's almost over, it's time to reflect on the work that I've done. Provide a brief overview of the topics I'll be discussing."
Rough Introduction:
Terry Hayes once wrote that "the world doesn't change in front of your eyes, it changes behind your back," a sentiment that I find rather comforting as I look back on the experiences that I have had and shared this semester. I walked into an English class in January knowing little of what to expect besides what I had experienced in classes prior. As time passed I found that the class I was expecting was vastly different from the one that I received, but I was able to adapt to the challenges and see that my understanding of English was growing each day. Now I see a future where I will not only be expected to write, but to provide insight into the situation at hand. Despite this knowledge that I have now, I did not always see this class as a way to strengthen my understanding but time makes that detail clear. Yet as I made my way through the course I was forced to struggle with conducting research like I never had before, understand how I needed to manage my limited time, and even take care of myself in order to become a proficient writer.
Writing an essay is vastly different from a podcast and even a QRG since it often has a much more formal tone along with having less of a focus on easy to read snippets but rather on the information being presented and how it is presented.
How did the production of this raw material go? What kinds of any hiccups, challenges, successes, creative epiphanies, etc. occurred during the process?
It was kind of difficult to figure out how I wanted to start the piece since I'm not entirely sure of all of the points that I'll be making yet, but after a while I figured out where I wanted to go.
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